Screenwriting Term 2 – Script Development – Draft 1

First Draft Script – PAIN [1st Draft]

As I was taking a break from writing my final draft for the script I submitted last term I decided to write something else in order to take my mind away from what I was writing at the time. As a result, I came up with Pain, a short thriller that takes place nearly entirely in one location and centres around a mother’s desire for revenge for her daughter. The idea for this short film actually came from a video game called Grand Theft Auto V in which there is a torture-based mission in it. I wanted to write a story that centred around a torture scene thus I came up with Pain.

Here is a video showing the mission from the game:

The script itself has a lot of torture scenes in it and after completing this draft and returning to it I couldn’t help shake the feeling that I just wrote a script with a lot of torture porn in it. Also the ending for this draft was too predictable and uninteresting so I knew that had to change. Even after I pitched the idea to my class, they too agreed that the ending needed to be rewritten in to something more interesting.

Therefore prior to the workshop sessions where we present our scripts to be read, I decided to rewrite this first draft into something with a story more focused on the characters and with a better ending.

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Filed under MDA2100 - Screenwriting: The Short Film

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